Finals Week

As I gulp down my third cup of coffee for the night I pray that the caffeine will sustain me just a few more hours. Tonight marks the halfway point of finals week and my third all-nighter in four days. A caffeine-induced panic is all that keeps me from passing out on the library floor. In the midst of growing anxiety over a calc 3 final I have on friday, I stop to think... what will it be like on that day? Will I be prepared when I have to stand before a holy, righteous God for my final examination? How gut wrenching will the moment be when I have to answer for every secret action, every hidden thought? God doesn't grade on a curve. He says that "whoever keeps the whole law but fails in one point becomes accountable for all of it" (James 2:10). Have I broken any of the ten commandments? Better yet, are there any that I haven't? What defense do I have against to judgment of "Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell" (Matthew 10:28)? Suddenly the stress of exam week seems trivial when I realize that my next breath could be my last and the wrath of God may only be a heartbeat away. There are no night-before cram sessions with death. No last-minute good deeds can make up for even one of my, of your, endless offences. How will you answer on that day? Have you kept all of the commandments perfectly? If not, what security do you have that your next breath will not be in hell?

Time for another cup of coffee.