Why can't I get this into my head?
I've always admired artists. In fact I've always craved to be a TRUE artist myself. You know the one: starving and raw, brilliant, but under appreciated. The one who hasn't sold out to society but is re-defining it. Living on the edge, living on passion and ramen noodles in a flat in some dangerous, but cheap, part of town.
Although I've taken the safer, get a job and a degree in something that will actually pay the bills, road, I've kind of regreted it. Wondering what would happen if I actually unleashed the creative energy I keep mostly locked up.
Well, today I was browsing around on a few friend's blogs. One in particular is one of those who has let their creative energy out in force. Anyways, I checked her blog out today, and although it doesn't give me any joy to say this, she is unable to keep a job, or an apartment. I couldn't believe it when I read it. She always seemed to be living the great, free spirited, vi boheme!
It really woke me up to see that although it may feel good temporarily to throw responsability and wisdom to the wind, in the long run it really doesn't satisfy (or pay the rent). It's a selfish life style. One that says "I'm going to do what makes me feel happy and when my life falls apart I'll rely on others, who have worked hard and sacrificed for what they have have"
So, although I'm itching to learn some new knitting patterns, or play around on my new graphic design software, or even read up on the latest interior design ideas, I will just keep telling myself that the grass is always greener on the other side, and make copies of the W-9 forms to give to our accountant.
